Pressures of Breastfeeding
Posted on 13th July 2020 at 11:35
‘Breastfed babies are more intelligent, they are happier, they never have any wind, they do so much better at school. Mothers who breastfeed are boss women, they can provide for their child anywhere, they know how to save money.’
Ladies, let us talk reality. All the above statements can cause a lot of anxiety and stress. I wanted to write this blog because I have seen hundreds of women say these lines to me on a daily basis. The one I hear the most is, “I feel like I have failed as a mother”.
Ladies, you have not failed, wake up to the real word and let me tell you this, fed babies are the HAPPIEST BABIES. A fed baby is a RELAXED BABY. Do not put these pressures on yourself.
Let me talk to you about breastfeeding and the real truths. It is tough! I say to every single woman, it is like riding a bike. There are many ups and downs. At first, you will be riding that bike with stabilisers, having all the support around you in hospital, and once you are home from the hospital those stabilisers come off, the fear creeps in that you are alone with this baby at home and the challenges and learning begins, but remember you can do it. You are amazing, you are beautiful even at 3am when your baby is screaming for a feed.
Let us talk about the pressures of breastfeeding.
Social media: I have seen all these ‘yummy mummies’ as they call themselves on Instagram with beautiful hair, face full of makeup as if the local MUA came over just before their baby was crying for a feed, baby on boob, phone in their hand with the hashtag, #breastfeedinglikeachamp, or #breastfeedinglikeaboss. Forget them, do not worry about them, this is NOT reality. At first your focus will be positioning and holding your baby during your feed. You do not have a spare hand for a mobile phone, you are not an Octopus. It's fine is you have not posted anything on social media or made a TikTok video. Focus on you and your baby.
The partner: Over my years of breastfeeding support, the number one pest, and the one who badgers you the most is The Partner. Now I am not saying every man is like this. Nope - I have seen some amazing men who have said to their partners, “your amazing how ever you feed our baby”. I hope that guy will be my baby father. Remember one thing ladies he does not have boobs; he does not have your body or your mind. He has no idea how you are feeling. If they are badgering you to breastfeed, complaining and downgrading you why you can not do it, or comparing you to other women, I say find some change at the bottom of your handbag and send him to the pub. Remember you decide how you want to feed. When you feel relaxed it will help to establish breastfeeding. A lot of the time men feel left out. They want to be included. In the first few days, you can get him to help you hand express. Catching colostrum in a tiny syringe is hard work and he will feel amazing. Tell him how amazing he is supporting you or put some supporting and encouraging words into his mouth. Remember to speak up. If you are struggling, voice it. Tell him how he can help you. He needs something to do. He will always be your support and rock.
Ladies I want to hear from you, tell me your stories and let's all have a giggle.
Tagged as: Breastfeeding
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